In those moments, I always let whomever I am with that I am feeling emotional. And those moments I am reminded how wonderful it is to be alive.
Clouds are the perfect mix of chaos and symmetry. They are fascinating and change colors and magical.
Today is when Blogging is hard. Today is one of those days where I am struggling with what to type. I had three weeks of moments where I struggled, and then like any storm, there was a break, and last week was typical. Even boring. Now that I am reflecting, I am glad that I…
This has impacted my days so much and the fact it was delivered from a friend. Make it feel like I am having coffee(even though I’m not a coffee drinker) with a friend. In truth I am, I am spending time with my Heavenly Father and learning about him and how he loves me.
I was also truly grateful that my parents instilled that going to National Parks is essential. It is truly amazing when you visit a place that the founders of our country decided to preserve just because of the beauty of the area.
God has blessed me. And even if I am tired or my emotional compacity is lower. I am here to experience it today. And some days are hard but not unbearable. I still get the chance to show up, and that is the most vital blessing.
My love of flowers stems from my Mom. Mother loves flowers, and both my grandmother love flowers.
Listening to God’s voice is sometimes heard through the noise of the world; however, it is ever-present and often a whisper. And when you look and make a point to listen, the peace that follows is unexplained.
Elephants are caring creatures, the babies throw tantrums, they are beautiful creatures, and I love just to watch them. I think if I went into conservation, I would try to save the elephants.
It’s God timing. I always have to remind myself that God is in charge, and he is the keeper of time. God’s plans are perfect. Even on my days when I am angry, God is still in charge. He knows the whole picture and understands what would be the best time.
Finally, Unplug. I didn’t check emails, I took pictures and spent time with family. However, don’t spend the entire vacation from the view of the viewfinder. Take part in the moments and watch for the magic. Enjoy the snacks, enjoy the characters, and finally breath. I honestly was able to have a break, and it was beautiful.
. But take your time, savor the moments. One of my favorite moments from my last trip was when we complimented a Chef as we saw him sweeping the floor. The chef took pride in his, and that was the best breakfast we had when were there.
Space allows for healing and quieting my insecurities that flare up when I am the victim. In the space, I cling to what I know is the truth. God Loves me. God created me. He delights in me. He has the best and master plan. God cries when his children cry.
I especially love the beauty of the sun bursting through the leaves. To me, it reminds me that God often breaks through to me like the sun, and he has always been there.
it makes my spidey-sense of observing things such as a dispute across the room and noticing when especially closed off people are having a hard day. Taking photographs allow me to channel that super power into something constructive.
Living life isn't about the conversations but the moments where one can just be. Just breathe. Just feel and just take in the world that surrounds us. I had a good weekend. Cancer is still apart of my life, and we only take each moment as it comes.
I try things more , ask questions more. I am easier to forgive and choose my battles. I know what's important and strive for those moments. I spend time with friends more often.
7 And that is what happened. God made this space to separate the waters of the earth from the waters of the heavens. 8 God called the space “sky.”
The answer that gives me hope is that my heavenly father has already accepted me and forgave me. He allows me with open arms and takes all my flaws and makes them beautiful.
I took pictures and revealed in God's beautiful creations. I spent time with Jman without talking about adulting and we just relished being best friends.
It’s not something I am proud of, but that just where my brain goes. The only time I didn’t expect the worst was when I was diagnosed with cancer. I know here is another blog about cancer, but it’s May. And much like Septemeber, I always feel more competitive about my cancer story.
I need to be kinder to myself. I need to cut myself a break when I struggle with fandom or with what someone says something not so lovely. I need to forgive myself for the mistakes I made. I need to acknowledge that sometimes I am tired and that it's okay to nap. And by taking a nap does not mean my Cancer has come back. I need to be honest with myself.
Today I am thankful for Christ and his sacrifice, that I am forgiven and loved by the creator of the universe. I am grateful for my readers, who allow me to write and be a writer who has been my dream for years. I am thankful for the hope that comes with sunrises. I am grateful for mornings like today where the anxiety is not drowning me.
Life sometimes is taking two steps forward and sometimes 3 steps back and with challenges makes us grow. They help us mature and become more whole. This is the way that God designed it, and yes sometimes I get frustrated and stressed. But I also know that God provides, he knows my heart and that someday those wants will be granted. It is about being patient and entirely relying on God even during bad times.
Taking pictures has become a peaceful activity that during stressful times it makes my brain shift to calm and focused instead of reeling.
Enjoy this gallery.
Fandoms that Surprised me I took a mental break on Monday, that's why there was no blog. Monday started with taking the car that we have owned for six months to get the brakes fixed only to be told that it was much more expensive then it the vehicle is worth. That sent us into…
I think writing fanfictions was that first step of bravery to publish my thoughts online. It was the first step to be accepting of people’s criticism. I am the type that if you say something in a negative tone toward me, I will backtrack to make you happy.
Mustard seed faith is not a checklist faith. It’s not an achievement unlocked. It just has faith in those times when I need to call out to God the most. It is having names for my future children even though I don’t know if this will happen. It’s praying to God to help with our finances when a change made and being aware that he has. It’s looking forward to a vacation and praying for that vacation. It’s praying for your spouse and seeing them become good-natured and slow to become angry. Faith like a mustard seed is those everyday moments when you call out to God and trust that he has control over your life. It is reading your Bible every day to keep the relationship with God alive, even though you may not hear God speaking. It is praying for dinner and giving thanks for the food.
This is a different kind of Hope. This hope takes the fear away from death. It’s a hope of forgiveness. It’s the hope that regardless of what I do and however I mess up. God will love me and forgive me. It’s about choice. Having a relationship with God is a choice. Accepting Jesus as your savior is a choice. Choosing to follow God every single day and forgiving myself on the days I stray is a choice. Easter is the epilogue of the story. It’s the post credit scene for a movie where the ending is not great. It’s the hope of something more. Easter is a promise of a better life and the promise that there is light at the end of the tunnel of life.
It’s no secret that Jman and I like to collect movies, we have over 300. We have classics like Oklahoma and Shawshank Redemption, to newer films such as Zootopia and The Legend of Tarzan.
New normal is not easy. There are days when routine helps. However, there are still days when I feel the familiar cold sensation of being back in the doctor's chair and feeling like I'm still going through it.
Thank You, God, for the challenges that will happen this week and when I am going through it will be so tired and frustrated to remember to say thank you.
I often wake up with a song stuck in head. It’s a nagging, and when I have a song stuck in my head, I can’t think of anything until I listen to that song again. This morning was no exception. I heard that song and was able to move on. My brain works so weirdly sometimes.
Vacation is important. It those moments to breathe, reflect and just be. It's a time to observe God’s beautiful world.
I keep my eyes focused on God, on things I need to do around my life. I take joy in conversations with people who didn’t know I needed to talk to someone who just loves me for me. Like Sis who out of the blue IMed me last week and it was like a balm to my hard heart.
During these moments of sadness, I remember to fix my eyes on God and remember to allow myself to be forgiving of myself. I also ask for peace.
However, Jman has taught me that Jesus wanted the idea of love to be without filters or blinders. It doesn’t discriminate by orientation, skin color, favorite superhero, football team, or even political understanding. It does not discriminate by religion or IQ.
Being creative takes practice and bravery. Sis is an artist. She actually has published 3 comic books. She also loves to draw. She loves anything that has to do with creating with art. She is one of the most creative people I know.
I extend grace. I try to stay positive. I pray for myself to have peace and knowledge when I am over analyzing. I stay busy.
SO I’ve done TV interviews, public presentations, and finally, things where I talk in front of people, and it's never easy but this what God wants from me.
Reading has been my escape, much like this blog has been a sounding board for my life, reading has shaped my life to examine the world, be observant and it's okay to get lost in a book.
God in charge of our finances, he is in charge of how many breaths I take, and he knows how many hairs on my head. He also knows what interactions are going to happen. He knows what events I will go to and who will be there and if what they say will make me upset.
God gives us challenging relationships to remember to love and pray for those people we don’t get along. Another thing to remember is to pray for forgiveness on your end.
We even try to go on dates while we are on vacation. I know what your thinking, you are already spending money on holiday. But taking time out of the hustle and bustle of even being on vacation is essential.
I breathe. I watch sappy movies.
Finally Church and having a place to worship is, but it doesn’t need to be a church with gilded steeples( although they are beautiful) it can be humble, a living room, a place that is sacred and maintained that allows for the beauty, respect and finally God’s voice to filter in.
I try to extend grace before getting angry, not because I want to excuse the wrong but because this is what God wants us to do. He is very clear on being slow to speak, quick to listen and slow to become angry. God wants us to hear and be slow to grow angry. God describes an angry tongue as a horrible sword.
Just being able to sit with me and have coffee relishing in the normalness for a few minutes I’m just a customer at a coffee shop. And our friendship survived because of that support.
It's Poetry Saturday and I have been so busy this week that I almost forgot about Poetry Saturday!!! If We Shadows have Offended, From Midsummer's Night Dream By William Shakespeare If we shadows have offended,Think but this and all is mended,That you have but slumber'd hereWhile these visions did appear.And this weak and idle theme,No…