The thing that struck me about this name. That God chased me and purchased me. Then his blood that is redeeming. His blood is healing and redeeming me. God chose me and redeemed me. His blood, for someone who has a blood cancer we focus on blood, has cleansed me and redeemed me.

I also find peace on a beach. The stark contrast of the loud waves, and sometimes crowd and wind, is so lively that my thoughts I have been fixating on leave in an instant, and I get to ruminate on other such things. Like how did God know how much salt to put in the ocean, why did that fandom end the way it did, and as the cobwebs of anxiety are cleared, I can come up to decision about the critical decisions.

It’s cold and gets dark earlier and I miss the sun and warm weather. Paired with tiredness, normal busyness, and just plugging along on this road we call life. I am always surprised when I don’t feel happy every single day like I used to as a child. Then I spend days convincing myself that its okay to feel sad or tired. The panic in my mind tells me that something is wrong and I don’t listen.

Poetry!!!

Characters that I consider family fought horrific battles and had devastating loses. They rose up from the rubble and took a step forward. Continuing to fight on.

Seeing fictional couples who are still tackling life together and even in love with each other is impressive. As a married woman, it’s reassuring for myself and Jman that there are couples who are like us. Happily ever after is wonderful but show us real marriages. 

Did Jesus struggle when he saw the wrongs of this world? Like I have when I see someone mistreated. Did he get angry with the darkness of this world? Like Jman does sometimes. Did Jesus have lots of friends, or was he an outcast? Did Jesus like learning in school, or did he prefer being outside and observing God’s creation? Did Jesus have Autism or something else that made him different outwardly?